The most important rule for a successful career is: always stay calm, don't panic, no matter how stressful, hectic or explosive the situation is. Easier said than done? I admit in the beginning it didn't seem easy for me to control all the negative emotions that built up in me from time to time due to anger, frustration, conflicts and pressure in everyday business life.
However, I have always been aware of the negative consequences of an angry outburst and - in order to avoid them - I have done some research and found out the best way to stay calm and composed in any situation. For this purpose, I have compiled my 5 best secret tricks below, which you can use in the future to keep a cool head in any situation.
1. Create mental and spatial distance
In order to stay calm, it is necessary to recognise the signs of pent-up anger early on. For example, rising blood pressure, nervousness, growling in the stomach area, flushing of the face and sweating can be alarm signals that announce the onset of emotional stress.
In order to stop their escalation, you should immediately create a mental distance, perhaps even a spatial distance, for example by withdrawing from each person and turning inwards. For example, in such cases you could go to the toilet and wash your face with cold water to cool yourself and your mind.
However, you should make sure that you do not get into another stressful situation, such as a group of people talking loudly, which causes even more stress. If the situation allows, it would also be appropriate to leave the building completely and go for a short walk.
The most important thing is, in short, to immediately turn inwards and withdraw mentally, if possible also spatially, for at least 5 minutes.
2. Change perspective
People always imagine things to be much worse than they really are. There is also a saying in German: "Nothing is eaten as hot as it is cooked". And indeed, 95 per cent of the things we worry about every day are unfounded and unnecessary.
For this reason, it is essential to look at the problem or the mental conflict situation in which one finds themself from another perspective, soberly and objectively, and in a new context. This also creates distance and directs the focus on the whole picture.
Often you realise afterwards that you wanted to get upset about things that do not correspond to reality at all and can be traced back to completely different causes. For example, a parking ticket could be the actual cause of the stress, which you then unconsciously project onto your colleague at work who is talking too loudly and take his loudness as a personal attack.
The following questions can help to find out the actual cause of the stress in such situations: What really just happened? Why am I reacting like this? Why am I suddenly getting so upset? Is it really worth it?
3. Positive thinking
So many things happen in the world every day - good and bad. Unfortunately, most of the news and media only cover the negative things. And the worst thing about all this is that the majority of the world's population is much more interested in the negative events than in the positive ones. Otherwise they would not be broadcast to such a high degree.
The problem can be clearly seen in the following example: People focus much more on the negative things in life instead of devoting themselves to the positive side. Accordingly, a newspaper edition with the article on the front page illustrating how an old lady is helped across the street would not sell as often as an edition with a murder case on the front page.
It should be noted at this point that it has been sociologically proven that people's behaviour in the outside world is more than 90 percent the same as their behaviour on a mental level. In short, this means that people also concentrate too much mentally on negative things instead of positive things.
And in fact, there is also a kernel of happiness in every misfortune. There are two sides to every coin. So the trick is to focus more on the positive. Especially if you want to be successful in life.
4. Do sport
The best way to relieve stress is physically. So when you're vexed again and you're upset about a person or a circumstance, sport is the best answer. And preferably a sport that really gets you going, like boxing.
It has been scientifically proven that kneading a punching bag on the one hand relaxes and distracts the mind, and on the other hand helps to focus attention on the essentials and to release blocks to thinking.
And as known - as with any other sport - a feeling of happiness sets in at the same time after the relief, which contributes to a healthy sleep and stops the negative mental cinema.
5. Listen to music
Music also has a significant influence on how we feel. If you want to stay calm, you can immediately soothe yourself with pleasant instrumentals, for example. Simply put on your AirPods, enter the term "instrumentals" in the YouTube search field and you'll have a huge selection of music to help you calm down in the next couple of minutes.
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